Friday, April 10, 2015

Surgery 2

Nov. 28, 1995 Troy was in the hospital again for the surgery to close his palate.  This wasn't just a small hole, the entire roof of his mouth was open.  It had never closed properly when he was growing in the womb.  So everything was open into his mouth and ears.  We thought he would have to stay in the hospital for 2 or 3 days.  But he did so well that he only had to stay one night.  Life for the next 2 weeks was very interesting.  He had to drink his milk from a cup. (at 6 months old)  No bottles or spoons were to be in his mouth.  He had to wear splints on his arms so he couldn't suck on his hands.  The sucking action could tear out the stitches.  We had been practicing giving him milk thickened with baby cereal from a cup for awhile before the surgery and he actually did really well with it. 
He hated the splints.  He was bored with them on because they made it hard to get around and he couldn't play with things or put them in his mouth which all babies love to do.  But as soon as they came off he was his old happy self.  Although he still had many surgeries ahead, mostly for tubes in his ears to combat chronic ear infections, and years of orthodontic treatment starting at a very young age, it was still miraculous that with two surgeries his mouth was nearly normal and to look at him you couldn't tell there had ever been an opening in his lip.
Of course I would not have changed this wonderful treatment for him.  But thinking now about the pain he went through and even about him not getting enough food for the first couple of weeks of his life, I can't help wondering what was going on in his little brain.  That is a lot of trauma for a baby to go through.  Did this have a long lasting effect on him?  I have to believe that the love he received from everyone around him had to counter balance the negatives.  But I know, from the work I do, that traumatic events in an infant's life can affect their little brains.
This also makes me think of things that happen in our lives that are painful for us to go through.  I knew that these surgeries were necessary for Troy's happiness in the long run.  I knew it would hurt him and I wished I could take the pain for him, but I knew I couldn't.  I knew the only way he could grow was to go through this painful experience.  I'm sure that Heavenly Father must feel the same about watching His children go through hard things.  He knows, even though we may not understand, that these experiences are necessary for us to grow.  He could take the pain for us, but that is the very thing that causes the stretching and growth in us.  So even though he doesn't want to see us suffer He knows it is necessary.  He will do everything He can to comfort us and help us to get through it.  Just like all of us loved on Troy and let him know we were there for him during the aftermath of those surgeries.  It gives me a better perspective on why there must be sad and difficult experiences in our lives. 

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